It has been 2493 days since I joined xanga.

Judging from my entries, it seems as though my life ended in December 2007. One and a half years have gone by and what has become of me? A part of my life I feel did end in December 2007 but a new chapter began from there. This chapter currently being written may be one of the darkest moments so far.

This year has been extremely tough and it is only going to get worse. It is those moments in your life, the hopeless moments, when you truly learn what you are without God.

All I hope is that I pray, I learn, and I obey.

To the new year... may it be a gloriously painful road towards Christ.

She turned to me and asked me with such sincerity if she could eat a waffle. I said no because she was sick and if she eats it she will feel even more sick. Her eyes turned sad still asking why?  I looked at her and realized right then and there how hard it was for my mother to refuse me something.

It's funny how when you are sick you become such a child. Suddenly you need someone to take care of you, feed you, tell you what you can or cannot eat. When you are sick you miss your mom the most.

I ended up giving in and letting her buy a waffle under the condition that she only take one bite and give the rest to our other friend. You should have seen the look on her face when I took away the waffle after the first bite. It was like those cartoon bunnies that start crying with the sad violon music in the background.

I ended up letting her have two more bites.

Things I will miss about Korea the place:

1) cheap food... and good food let me tell you.
2) the convenience of living downtown (you can basically go out and get anything you want)
3) mini-stop ham sandwiches.. the simple pleasures of ham cheese and soft bread
4) noraebang ... freaking 2-2.5 hours for a mere 12-15 dollars!!!
5) dvd rooms - i know i know sounds really shady but actually its a really great place to just watch a movie and chill with your friends.
6) public transportation - sooooo convenient with the automatic card beeping thingys.
7) service. everywhere you go in korea, there is ALWAYS good service and you dont have to tip them. and or they give you stuff for free.
8) ho dduk!!! street vendors selling the greasy ho dduks.. the BEST.
9) my nice clean NEW dorm room with the floor heating and the keypad locks so i never need a key.
10) im sorry to admit it but i will miss cafes and bars, korea always makes everything look so pretty that anywhere you go you can sit down and relax in a nice atmosphere.

Things I won't miss about Korea:

1) children wearing more expensive clothes than me
2) ahjoomas who can't shut up...
3) COUPLES COUPLES COUPLES EVERYWHERE YOU GO!
4) basically korean people in general
5) people yelling at you to buy things from their stands.
6) work work
7) drunk people on the streets at night... especially drunk girls hanging on their boyfriends...
8) noisy streets and bad air
9) korean teachers... they are all so damn overly patriotic it makes me sick
10) the korean currency... dude just say 1 won why the heck is it 1,000 won?!?!

Even twenty days don't seem enough to say goodbye.

In twenty days I'll be sitting in my house, on my couch, with a terrible aching feeling that I'm truly without something.

I feel like I wasted so much time but in the end, it's all I could do.

I won't miss Korea that much but I will miss my friends... my so lovely lovely friends.

Distance seems alot scarier now that it's getting so close to goodbye.